Stalking Tuna
by Tik-Tok-Sky
Summary: Hibari Kyoya, the untouchable Skylark. Giotto Vongola, the coolest kid in school. Both of them are having a war when stalking… Teenage Dunce Tsuna? AU. Christmas fic for Bishi-Bishi. 1827G. Crack.


Stalking Tuna

Summary:- Hibari Kyoya, the untouchable Skylark. Giotto Vongola, the coolest kid in school. Both of them are having a war when stalking… Teenage Dunce Tsuna? AU. Christmas fic for Bishi-Bishi. 1827G.

Notes: AU since I want it that way and I prefer AU's, plus, I didn't have a surname for Giotto and I didn't want to name him Leyasu. I was meant to write Romance/Angst, but th-then… well, It turned into humour instead? So this will… in the end, probably be crack! And a lot of Drama.

P.S Giotto is kinda gonna be majorly OOC, sowwy o.e

WARNINGS:- LOTS OF TUNA-FISHY HERE! TURN BACK IF YOU NO LOOKIE FOR TUNA FISHY xDDD

1827G. Yaoi. Mild (me thinkz) sexual theme. You get the picture, now please enjoy.

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><p>Rated: T<p>

Glaring daggers, Hibari Kyoya stood with his disciplinary coat slung in a lazy manor over his coat as Giotto Vongola sat hap-hazardly on the teachers' _desk_, chatting away to the large selection of female fans as he bit into this remarkable… _Tuna Sandwich._

"Herbivore, I highly recommend you move." he growled, this close to drawing out his Tonfas that sat in his coat, hidden well. "I do not tolerate grouping together either."

Giotto laughed, swinging his legs off the desk and knocking over a pile of jotters and the teachers stencils. He was going to get into trouble later.

"You should relax a bit more often!" said Giotto, honey eyes staring back at steel onyx. He flicked his blonde hair lightly, causing the girl next to him to topple over in a fake-attempt at fainting. Seriously, how gullible were these fan girls? He only flicked his _hair_.

Hibari stood tall, before he walked to the door and glanced down the hallway to figure out where all the screaming was coming from. Ah. _He _was here. The screaming herbivore also known as Sawada Tsunayoshi… And it appeared he was being chased by Mochida _again_.

He must have fallen over at some point, considering his clothes were slightly ripped and it seemed he had scrapped his right arm and cheek. It looked rather cute in Hibari's eyes.

Sticking his arm out, Hibari clenched his fist and then BAAAM! Mochida hit his head and fell to the ground. Too bad you can see someone's eyes going crossed in a cartoon of some form. Grabbing Tsuna by the cuff of his shirt, he dragged him away.

Giotto's eyes brightened as he leapt over the female crowds' heads, a smirk on his face. He liked a game, really he did. In a lot of aspects he was very mature, but he absolutely loved to play games.

'_This is going to be a fun game… Hibari Kyoya~'_

* * *

><p><strong>Science Class<strong>

BOOM.

"SAWADA! YOU DESTROYED THE DAMN BURNER!"

"H-HIEEE! I'm s-sorry!"

In the corner of the class, Hibari felt his eyebrow twitch in irritation. This was the fourth time Tsuna had blown/destroyed something in class this _week_, never mind that; it was only the start of the third year! How embarrassing, for him that is.

"_Tsuna-sama, as your butler I can deal with this!" _what class clown was this? Hibari looked to see no one else other than Giotto, who had one of those mischievous grins on his face. What the hell was he up to now?

"G-Giotto-san?" Tsuna looked shocked. Hibari narrowed his eyes. It was clear Giotto rarely talked to him. Was this some way of pissing him off? He didn't move from where he sat. As the head of the disciplinary committee, this had absolutely nothing to do with him. Nothing at all-

"W-What are you doing?" looking up, his eyes flickered when he saw Giotto hugging him in a death grip, laughing madly.

"I thought you were on fire~"

"I-I'm not! Let go!"

Everyone was laughing and Hibari was about to scowl until he heard the teacher shout again. Said teacher was scared of losing marks. Hibari Kyoya was checking how well he could teach, after all. Giotto kept clinging to Tsuna, looking at Hibari while sticking his tongue out.

He was so close to giving detention to all these damn herbivores-!

BEEP. BEEP. BEEP.

Ah. The bell. Good. Getting to his feet, Hibari grabbed Tsuna by the cuff of his shirt once more and whispered lightly in his ear.

"Watch it, _Tsunayoshi_."

* * *

><p><strong>Math ClassLunch**

"Sawada! That was the simplest sum in the world!"

Tsuna flinched. Not only was he failing at maths, but with Giotto clinging to his leg and Hibari's stare at his back, he wasn't exactly _comfortable_. The most popular boy in his year was clinging to him like there was no tomorrow. The untouchable skylark had, for some strange reason, staked his claim on him and him alone.

Should he be scared? Yes, these two were acting like sharks and he was nothing but a little innocent Tuna… All he wanted to do was have a peaceful life, couldn't he have that?

Clearly not. He started shrieking when Giotto got to his feet and hugged him into a death-hold. He could hear Hibari snarling and a few girls fainting. Somehow, he managed to escape and ran out the classroom as the lunch bell went, only just managing not to get crushed by a group of fan girls that were chasing the other two popular kids, Gokudera and Yamamoto.

Rushing round the corner, he squealed when he ran into the arms of Hibari Kyoya. Seriously, was he being stalked or something? He kept him still before pushing him out the way. He could _feel _the anger going through the air. If it got any worse, then maybe the school would go BOOM!

Then again, that isn't such a bad thing, is it? Letting out another shriek, he heard the sound of metal hitting off a doorframe. Hibari wanted to spill someone's blood, and Tsuna could kinda tell on who it was.

Looking behind himself, Giotto let himself be known, the normal flock of fan girls obviously assuming he was here to fight Hibari, but it reality was only stalking Tsuna.

If being hugged all over the place by the most popular boy in the school and having the disciplinary head as your best friend wasn't bad enough, they were both acting possessive… Well, Giotto was acting kinda-

CRASH!

"Get off me!" yelled Tsuna abruptly, feeling Giotto crushing him with his weight and Hibari pulling him by the arms while snarling. Wriggling, he got away from Giotto, and in his panic… he accidently _smacked Hibari Kyoya in the __**face**__._

The easiest option right now? BOLT!

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><p><strong>P.S.EPersonal and Social Education**

Was the world trying to curse him today? Tsuna hid his head on the table, much like a lot of other people at the video they were forced to watch. Comparing human and animal mating was _not _his cup of tea at all.

Looking behind himself, he paled to see Hibari at the back of the class, lounging lazily across a table as he glared daggers at Giotto, who was joking about. He then put his hand up and asked a question that made Tsuna want to faint.

"I know in humans two boys can be together, but can animals _do it_ too?" the teacher scowled and Hibari felt an eyebrow twitch. What kind of question was that? More accurately, was that female teacher going to-!

"Do not bring up such a question in my class!" she screeched. Hibari smirked. Tsuna face-palmed. Giotto remained laughing.

"But if you don't tell me _miss_, I'll never know and I'll have to make assumptions! Better yet, I _might _want to test the theory out!"

How much more embarrassing can this get? Tsuna was already bright red, as were a bunch of girls, and he saw a group of boys laughing. Why was he acting like such a female? Tsuna hid his face, praying that the bell would ring soon, but no such luck was coming to him. There was around another ten minutes to go!

"_Miss, _why are so many people against two boys going out?" asked Giotto innocently- hold on, innocent? He was pulling this act to humiliate people, wasn't he? Or maybe he really was clueless? And Tsuna thought _he _was stupid! The teacher chose to ignore the statement and skimmed through her files, placing a cross next to Giotto's name.

It was the question Giotto popped out of no where that startled everyone.

"_Tsuna, can you answer that question for me?_" God really did hate him. Maybe he should go flee the classroom right now, but everyone was looking at him with amused expressions. Perhaps he should pretend to faint? Maybe he should-

"OW!" Tsuna cried out, feeling Hibari come behind him and grab him by the hair, dragging him out the room as if he didn't have a care in the world. The girls were shocked, the boys were jeering and Giotto simply blinked in a clueless way.

"Did I say something wrong?"

* * *

><p><strong>Art<strong>

Being forced to stand in front of class and describe the painting before him as a punishment was the worst thing in the world. Hibari had deliberately made the teacher pick him out, simply since he sat directly next to _Giotto_.

"I-It's… u-umm… Well… it's… colourful…" Tsuna was screaming inside. What about this picture was colourful? It was a chair, a freaking _chair_. It was muddy brown and sand damnit! It wasn't _colourful _at all. Plus, what the hell was wrong with this picture? It had white splotches all over it.

Giotto looked at the picture dully, aiming a paper aeroplane at Hibari's head and started whistling as he looked at the random white bits across the chair.

"Looks like some guy had a great time with himself." said Giotto randomly. The girls in the class blushed and had instant nosebleeds as Tsuna just froze. How the hell could someone make a joke like that… in _art? _

"U-Um…" Tsuna had gone really pale and the teacher looked shocked at the sudden noise. A table that could be broken so quickly… perhaps they needed new tables. Hibari Kyoya looked so mad. Why did Giotto have to make such comments while he was inspecting classes? _Why…?_

Everyone had run for their lives while Tsuna remained rigid, watching the two. Giotto was running around like a daft idiot and Hibari had murderous intent practically flaring off him.

Turning on his heel, Tsuna bolted out the room, horrified.

* * *

><p><strong>Outside<strong>

Finally, Tsuna could get some free time to himself. He wandered outside, checking behind himself every few seconds before he slipped on snow, bashing his head off the ground and earning a few snickers.

He was never going to find any luck, was he? Getting back up and rubbing his numb hands together (Mochida had flushed his gloves down the toilet and Tsuna wasn't that stupid to get them back out). He glanced round, watching kids run about and bumping into him without a care in the world.

He wouldn't have had a care in the world either, but in this stupid, tiny world where _Giotto_ lived, he was getting no such luck. Seriously, what was it with the popular blonde boy pinning him to the floor all the time?

"Let's go get something to eat, _Tuna-kun!_" What. The. Hell? Did people really think of him as a tuna? Not to mention the fact it looked like Giotto was about to drool on him. He squeaked uncertainly, his body going numb as it was pinned to the floor.

Someone, save him!

VOOM! Hibari Kyoya appeared out of no where and hit Giotto across the head, scowling. Tsuna opened his eyes and didn't know what was better, feeling Hibari Kyoya's glare or being crushed by every girl's freaking idol. Seriously, how did someone like him, the dunce, get so much attention?

And then… why was he the only one to witness two of the most popular kids in school fight? It wasn't funny. Perhaps he should just crawl away, take a few days off school, pretend none of this ever happened-!

He felt one arm being grabbed before the other was pulled the other way, causing him to screech. Hibari was wearing a cold expression while Giotto was smiling madly.

"You have to choose one of us Tsuna~!" he laughed, tugging him over. "Come with me and we'll have lots of fun!"

Hibari tugged on his side, causing him to yelp.

"You're not going with him. He'll make you stupider."

Was that meant to be a compliment? Who knows, Tsuna shook his head closing his eyes and shouting.  
>"I just want to go home! Give me peace!" he yelled, but all it resulted in were a few more pulls. Why did he have to be the victim of a game of tug-of-war? Why him? Why, <em>WHY?<em>

* * *

><p><strong>At home<strong>

Flopping on his bed, Tsuna closed his eyes, yawning tiredly. He didn't bother getting changed, he didn't even bother curling up under his blankets. He just lay there, exhausted.

On the left side of his face, it was doodled with Giotto's name and the words 'Tuna Stalker', and on his right side was neatly written in Hibari's italic- 'Herbivore', 'Hibari Kyoya' and all the stupid school rules were there.

He dreaded going to school tomorrow. Two hungry sharks, one little lonely Tuna.

Translation – He was screwed!

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><p>AN:- Hope you enjoyed, Merry (early) Christmas **Bishi-Bishi!**

P.S Hope it wasn't too sucky owo

~Sky~


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